16 – The one I wasn’t mentally prepared for.
“The Mental Capacity Act (MCA) 2005 applies to everyone involved in the care, treatment and support of people aged 16 and over living in England and Wales who are unable to make all or some decisions for themselves.”
“When a young person over the age of 16 has been assessed as lacking mental capacity, there may be many different people and agencies involved in making decisions on their behalf, depending on the complexity of the situation.”
So yeah, decisions in Alastair’s health and welfare can now legally be made by professionals, in what they deem to be in Alastair’s ‘best interest’, after meeting him for how long?! While we have been reassured that a parents voice can go a long way this is still our reality. And I’m scared.
16 is also the same age that I met Adams Myth, Alastair’s Dad. Which I’m pretty sure was like yesterday? Alastair reminds me a lot of myself at the same age. Totally checked out of school and ready for a new challenge. He’s determined and completes anything he sets his mind to. Music mad and stylistic. It’s a shame the same can’t be said about Adam at 16 but the less said about that the better.
But anyway, as has become tradition, lets look back on this milestone day on what it was like for Alastair BEING 15!
Alastair started the year with 2 weeks without Mum!! The longest he has ever been without me. Was he bothered? NO! He lived life to the fullest with his Dad and two PA’s. I’m still jealous of the Bowie gig and Leeds trip!
Words can not describe how much our lives have changed since Betty and Josh stepped into our home just over a year ago. The support they have given us all has been outstanding. I just love watching Alastair go to the door as soon as he see’s you waiting for his next adventure. Oh and you both make mornings not only bearable, but fun!
We’ve dedicated every Thursday evening to Alastair this year. He gets full control of what we do. We listen to him, observe him, encourage his chosen activities to allow him to thrive as an individual. He ‘tells’ us so much during this focussed time. We’ve been bowling, to the arcade, the cinema and to pretty much every Trinity Live we could make. But despite better parental guidance Alastair has found a love of Nando’s, fucking Nando’s!
Our first city break of the year was to Liverpool where Alastair cemented his love for The Beatles and actually took time to admire art in Tate Liverpool!!
Sadly his epilepsy became uncontrollable over Easter resulting in ambulance attendance and a (thankfully short) hospital admission. Despite missing almost a month of school, Alastair bounced back after a few changes in medication and kept all of his skills which he has often lost in the past.
Our next break was Alastair’s first tip to Amsterdam! We love it here. We walked out to De Pijp where Alastair enjoyed fresh Stroopwafels and Bitter Ballen, oh and far too many milkshakes which made him super super happy, so much so he forgot to look around the Red Light District!
Alastair has also visited Hardraw Force, an OK Diner to relive his American road trip, Manchester to watch me graduate (poshskipMA) and York many times, mainly for Spark!
He’s stood on another picket line, tried his hand at roller skating and was even live on the radio. (although the wrong version of Man Who Sold the World was played and Alastair was mortified!)Oh and he had the entire crowd chanting his name during a Bunkerpop gig at Freedom Festival!
I have enjoyed watching Alastair mature this year. Last year I spoke of Alastair’s crippling anxiety, this has been minimised thanks to the consistent support of his PA’s. This in turn has allowed Alastair to be more present in different situations. This year he has learnt to be more patient, more aware and more empathetic.And the biggest thing?! Alastair has learnt to stand still this year. I don’t think we’ve ever given him the chance to do this before. Run before you can walk springs to mind. I’ll never tire of seeing him stand, on his own.
They say it takes a village to raise a special needs child. Well here’s our village and we love every single one of them!
Smiling and Waving 